Oh Mama, I'm in fear for my lifeFrom the long arm of the law.
Hangman is coming down from the gallows
And I don't have very long.
Thus was the plaintive dirge heard before Tuesday's game, sung in pure seventies harmony by Rotters foe-of-the-moment, "The Renegades."
Just what you would expect from a bunch of Styx fans.
Oh Renegades, you had it made, but then you played the Rotters. Raleigh's finest football freaks beat the stout, plucky Renegades handily, by an official 3-1 tally. However, when you add in Danica's brilliant left-footed goal, called back on an inexplicable off-sides call, that brings the total to 4-1. Considering the the lone Renegade goal was actually score by Jeff "sideways five" Williford with a beautifully executed through-the-legs f**kup, that brings the actual Rotter total to 5 goals, with a big nil left for the Rotund Renegades.
Chris "Mullet Warrior" O' Shagenessy scored his first career goal early in the contest. Aly followed with a brilliant header on a Sam throughball. And then somebody else scored, too. Don't tell me who it was, I'll think of it eventually. Maybe it was me. I actually played in the game. I may have even touched the ball, and by touching it, could have guided it into the goal. But I don't think that happened.
Did O'Shagenessy's Mullet Power cancel out the Renegade's Styx Energy? Such questions are beyond the humble Rotter mind. But we soldier on, confident in our knowledge that Journey is the best cheesy arena rock band, followed closely by Night Ranger. Styx is somewhere near the bottom, under Rainbow. And the Righteous Rocketing Rotters are a little closer to the top of the Elite Premier Coed C League with each stunning triumph.
(That reminds me - Triumph is right above Rainbow in the arena rock rankings. Right below Argent and Aldo Nova.)
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