TASL has determined that the Royal Raleigh Rotters Ancient and Benevolent Football Society's crushing 8-2 record was sufficient to triumpantly and decisively win the mighty Coed C League. It took TASL officials only 2 months to figure out who had won, understandable since each team payed a mere $1,500 for the privilege of playing.
We get T-shirts.
Plans are afoot for a ticker-tape parade, on either Fayetteville Street, the Champs-Elysees, or Kirby Street.
Do we get a trophy?
What the Rotters certainly do get is the powerful knowledge that we never gave up, we fought until the end, we gave 117%, we left it all out on the field, and we tried pretty hard in most of the games. We also usually showed up sober, and limited our pre-game cigarettes to 2 or fewer. It wasn't easy. Several male Rotters abstained from conjugal relations for the entire season, although it is not clear whether this was entirely by choice.
We are the Steelers without a trophy. We are Lance Armstrong without cancer (yet). We are Italy without diving. We are Rocky. We are invincible. We are woman.
The Rotters are looking forward to the great things that can and will happen in season III, if we didn't screw up and forget to register. More crushing victories? An undefeated record? All is possible for the mighty, mighty, mighty, mighty Rotters.
