Thursday, September 14, 2006

We Can Rebuild Him



Wounded Rotter Pete Farquhar has regained hope in his epic battle against injury and self-pity. With the help of modern surgery and remedial education, Farquhar underwent a 12-hour operation to insert a 7th grade shop project into his ankle. It is hoped that the aglomeration of screws and metal will allow Farquhar to return to competitive semi-professional Coed soccer, while also earning an A+ in Metal Shop I for Matthew Sturgeon, Fuquay Varina Middle School, grade 7.

With any luck, the stumbling non-profiteer will be back in action just in time to re-injure himself. In the meantime, the Rotters will soldier on, breaking alcohol prohibitions, breaking bones, break dancing, taking smoke breaks, and continuing to crush and/or tie opposing teams.

1 comment:

numero ocho said...

They're never going to allow you on an airplane again. CAC