Not to be outdone by esteemed teammate Danica Bananica, several male Rotters will compete in Raleigh's 11th annual Surreal-A-Thon. The gruelling contest of wills begins with a 13-hour-long game of drunken curling, involving sliding and falling and not knowing the rules, similar to our experiences inthe Coed C League. Howdy, pard'ner! Should the Boy Rotters survive the first hazardous and stupid event, it's time to mosey on over to Dorten Arena for drunken bull riding. Rotters can injure themselves walking onto a soccer field, so there should certainly be some trips to the hospital for the weak-minded but determined cowpokes in black. We are the rootin'est tootin'est soccer team in Raleigh, so we are sure to find a home on the Raleigh range, playing with deers and antelopes, seldomly hearing discouraging words, and tumbling like tumbleweeds. And I have run out of bad cowboy puns, so it's on to the next event.
Rotters are not really good with numbers or letters, but we sure know our colors really really well. Are you proud of us? The third event, Full-Contact Candyland, should be a walk in the candycane forest for the Sugar Plum Rotters. Kicking, punching, and full-body checking are all in bounds in this contest of strength and intellect. Yes, a few good men will get stuck in the Gooey Gumdrop Swamp. Only one will survive to rescue the Lollipop Queen, and thusly be declared the Surrealist Triathlon Champion. Do we have what it takes? Probably not.
1 comment:
We might have a better chance at this if we attempted it as the Lollipop Angels rather than as the Rotters. CAC#8
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